Well weve had some really good times with our caravan , but now i have he bad times. We started caravaning in the early 70s and nothing ever stopped us , wind rain snow you name it , but now its different, my wife passed away on 31 October and the dark nights seem to go on for ever and the days seem empty, well they will after 42 years of doing everything together. But i have made my mind up to hitch up and go to our sons at Saundersfoot Pembrokeshire for Xmas. We have 2 sons there and i couldnt stand Xmas in the house. I would like to wish you all on the forum a good Xmas and a prosperous new year. Graham
bad times
- Thread starter GrahamDerby
- Start date
Go for it Graham!
No-one can ever understand what you are feeling right now, not even a fellow- bereaved. Your feelings are entirely unique to you, and no-one else.
I'm very fortunate that my soul-mate of 48 years is still very much with me, and we still enjoy our caravan together.
My best mate and neighbour, however, has not been so lucky, having lost his wife of 50 years 18 months ago.
Left to his own devices, he began to go downhill, until I suggested one day, about three months after his tragedy, that he dug out his caravan, and joined us at our Royale club's 40th anniversary rally. Reluctantly, he did so, and slowly, slowly he has got back into caravanning mode!
I'm not suggesting it was easy for him. Losing Jean was terrible for my wife and I, so cannot imagine what it was like for him, but, he has pulled round, and now has a life of sorts without his beloved.
He still cries ocassionally, but now he doesn't cry alone.
There is life out there Graham, and your family, and your caravan will help you find it.
Go safe, tow safe.
Emmerson
No-one can ever understand what you are feeling right now, not even a fellow- bereaved. Your feelings are entirely unique to you, and no-one else.
I'm very fortunate that my soul-mate of 48 years is still very much with me, and we still enjoy our caravan together.
My best mate and neighbour, however, has not been so lucky, having lost his wife of 50 years 18 months ago.
Left to his own devices, he began to go downhill, until I suggested one day, about three months after his tragedy, that he dug out his caravan, and joined us at our Royale club's 40th anniversary rally. Reluctantly, he did so, and slowly, slowly he has got back into caravanning mode!
I'm not suggesting it was easy for him. Losing Jean was terrible for my wife and I, so cannot imagine what it was like for him, but, he has pulled round, and now has a life of sorts without his beloved.
He still cries ocassionally, but now he doesn't cry alone.
There is life out there Graham, and your family, and your caravan will help you find it.
Go safe, tow safe.
Emmerson
Mel
Moderator
Graham, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I think it is absolutely right to get the van hitched up and go off for Christmas. It will be really hard and I'm sure that there will lots of sad moments, but it won't be any harder than staying put.
all the very best
mel
all the very best
mel
Parksy
Moderator
I'm so sorry to learn of your loss Graham and you are doing the right thing in hitching up and spending Christmas with your sons.
I should imagine that they will be pleased to be doing something constructive and you will all be helping each other.
You will be in our thoughts and prayers, and in the new year never forget that you have internet friends who care about you.
I should imagine that they will be pleased to be doing something constructive and you will all be helping each other.
You will be in our thoughts and prayers, and in the new year never forget that you have internet friends who care about you.
Bless you Graham - I can't begin to understand what you are feeling right now, only I know how devastated I would be to lose my OH and we've only been together for ten years. Parksy is right, you are not alone on here and you won't be alone with your fellow caravanners and I truly believe your beloved wife will be with you in your heart wherever you go ... in all your wonderful memories. God bless you. Lisa xx
Damian
Moderator
My thoughts are with you, and best wishes for the uncertain future ahead of you Graham.
Thats all I can say.
Thats all I can say.
Thank you all for your thoughts , they are very much appreciated. Its like being at sea and becalmed , the winds gone out of my sails and the engine is broke, but i hope after i get over Xmas it will get easier. A merry xmas to you all.
Graham,
I don't suppose for a minute that there is much anyone can say that will ease what you are going through at the moment. I think you are doing the right thing in going to spend Christmas with your sons. No doubt there will be a few tears shed over the Festive period as you think back on times shared. Easier said than done I am sure but try and focus on the good times shared and the happy memories, that and the fact that I am sure your wife would not want you to feel unhappy and distressed. A difficult time for you and your family but I am sure you and your family & friends will give each other the support you need to get through this. My thoughts and best wishes for the future go out to you.
Robert
I don't suppose for a minute that there is much anyone can say that will ease what you are going through at the moment. I think you are doing the right thing in going to spend Christmas with your sons. No doubt there will be a few tears shed over the Festive period as you think back on times shared. Easier said than done I am sure but try and focus on the good times shared and the happy memories, that and the fact that I am sure your wife would not want you to feel unhappy and distressed. A difficult time for you and your family but I am sure you and your family & friends will give each other the support you need to get through this. My thoughts and best wishes for the future go out to you.
Robert
Graham......
Rob-T has written word for word what I wanted to say so I wholeheartedly reiterate what he has written.
I would just add.......... maybe leave the caravan at home for now unless you need it for accommodation.
You will know with your experience that winter caravanning has more potential to cause aggravation....... driving in icy conditions (on your own?) coping with potential caravan faults etc.etc.
Just a suggestion.
Rob-T has written word for word what I wanted to say so I wholeheartedly reiterate what he has written.
I would just add.......... maybe leave the caravan at home for now unless you need it for accommodation.
You will know with your experience that winter caravanning has more potential to cause aggravation....... driving in icy conditions (on your own?) coping with potential caravan faults etc.etc.
Just a suggestion.
Morning Graham,
My heartfelt deepest sympathies to you and your family at this tragic time .
Christmas wont be easy but I am sure your wife would want all of you to remember all the happy times you had together. We see our caravan as our sanctuary and maybe the privacy it can give will help a bit.
You will be in our thoughts and prayers..
My heartfelt deepest sympathies to you and your family at this tragic time .
Christmas wont be easy but I am sure your wife would want all of you to remember all the happy times you had together. We see our caravan as our sanctuary and maybe the privacy it can give will help a bit.
You will be in our thoughts and prayers..
Christmas will always be hard as are all other celebrations. We spend all our energy trying to make things as positive as possible for our youngest, who struggles to cope with her birthday (next Tuesday she'll be 9) Christmas and the anniversary of the death of my first wife/her mother on the 28th December. All too much for her often but she has got ways of coping (as have I) and getting through most times of the year with minor blips along the way. Thanks to friends in clubs, my daughter's strength of will, family and the support of fellow forum members we kept going with the van, now we're 5 we're glad that we did and that Jen and the girls are loving the way of life the van affords us. I know I'm lucky in that one of my closest and best friends is now my wife and that I was young enough to start again but, even if I hadn't of had this advantage I would of kept going with the van.
Take care and we'll be thinking of you, and everyone else on the forum that have had loses this year.
Take care and we'll be thinking of you, and everyone else on the forum that have had loses this year.
This may be appropriate;
THE EMPTINESS WITHIN-
There is an emptiness within-- Not complete, but partial-still an empty void.
Sorrow penetrates my heart, causing life to loose it's radiant joy.
My dreams-are life within- but I cannot grasp a dream to hold it close beside.
The loss I feel is without measure.
It fills my depths with darkness that only God's light can penetrate.
But even with God's precious love, the emptiness remains, until your love returns into my life.
Then joy and radiance can spill forth to fill my world again.
Author: Carolyn Ford Witt
Graham I wish you all the best and may your heart be filled with joy again.
Ian
THE EMPTINESS WITHIN-
There is an emptiness within-- Not complete, but partial-still an empty void.
Sorrow penetrates my heart, causing life to loose it's radiant joy.
My dreams-are life within- but I cannot grasp a dream to hold it close beside.
The loss I feel is without measure.
It fills my depths with darkness that only God's light can penetrate.
But even with God's precious love, the emptiness remains, until your love returns into my life.
Then joy and radiance can spill forth to fill my world again.
Author: Carolyn Ford Witt
Graham I wish you all the best and may your heart be filled with joy again.
Ian
There is not a lot I can add to what has been said already but I do hope you can get over your sad loss, enjoy your Christmas and you can make new friends on sites next year. Good luck.
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