European Terror Alert Status Update

Jul 2, 2006
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>The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross."

Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

Terrorists have been re-categorised from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody

Nuisance."

>

>The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

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>Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide."

The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate."

The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain:

"Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

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>The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs."

They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

>

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
 
Mar 14, 2005
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Loved your post, and thought about taking it to work for the rest to giggle over, but working for a multi-racial company, end result would be severe sense of humour failure and me joining the dole queues.

Great post though :)
 
Mar 14, 2005
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I hate prejudice of any sort - but feel very disturbed that "Ramblingrose" feels they may be fired for having a sense of humour.

Considering Reading Council has just cancelled the large Muslim festival that was to be held in two weeks time due to "potential problems" - I suspect that both "sides" will use the cancellation as a victory or a slight against them dependent upon their viewpoint.

Neither will see it as the sensible decision that it is in view of wider events.

As Christmas approaches - I wonder if the same stupididity that affected some councils last year will appear again? - I am talking about the re-naming of Christmas as a "Winter Festival" or other numpty nonsense for fear of upsetting other non Christian religions.

I reckon there will be a massive outcry if they dare to try to do the same this year.
 

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