I took two of my kids to a riding stables in the south of France. When we arrived I was the only adult among about 12 kids. The owner, who couldn't speak hardly any English and me no French gestured which was my horse. I looked at it and thought "omyyyyyyy Godddddddd", it was MASSIVE.
We then walked up through the vineyards and I recall, after clambering up onto the hulks back, that this wasn't bad. The man then asked us all "gallup gallup"?
The kids were all for it so me, not wanting to lose face, agreed. The horses took off and so did I. The kids whooped with glee while I had all kind of visions flashing before my face and also wishing I had made out a will. As the horse went down I went up in the saddle, as the horse came up I came down and my nether regions were taking a battering, if only I had bought a jock strap to wear.
Eventually they all stopped thankfully and I came in last. I tried to put on a brave face by smiling but it was more a grimace from the pain. After giving the horses a rest the owner said again "gallup gallup"? I shook my head to say no and he said ok and made a gesture for me to walk. So off they went, all those brave little kiddywinks, whooping away, making me look a coward. My horse was eating grass so I pulled the reign round to get him to walk but the bu**er bit my shoe. It was at this point that this horse from Hades spotted the others galloping off and took off in pursuit. How I stayed on that damn horse I will never know but I do remember telling the kids it was pure skill and I was showing off..... hehheh! I was leaning over that snorting monsters head almost kissing him while hanging on to the pommel for dear life. I have never been happier in my life than to get off that horse, I thought I was a gonner :O( We left that ranch and I never as much as looked back at that evil *********, infact I never cared if I never saw another horse in my life. My bruises never went until after the holiday and I was walking so bow legged that I couldn't have stopped a pig in a passage. If only they had video cameras in those days. I'm sure it would have been on You Tube.