Widowed & young

[farmerdave21]

Hi.
I was wondering if anyone can help me. I have recently lost my wife to cancer on 16/12/2010. We have had 18 years of happy caravanning together & now i have to go it alone. Our children are grown up & so dont really come away with us apart from main holidays.
I want to try & caravan still but am going to find it really hard like everything in my life at the moment. I am only 48 & we had been together for 25 years, would have been 23 years married on 19/12/2010 just 3 days before i lost my lovely wife.
I would appreciate any comments from people who have gone through the same experience & if there are any clubs out there for widowed people who caravan.
Thanks
Regards
David

 

[GeorgeandAde]

How sad farmerdave21.
Im very sorry to hear of your sad loss.
I cant begin to imagine what you are going through.
I do hope you will be able to find a club suitable.

 

[Mel]

Hi David, so sorry to hear of your dreadful loss. I found these. Hope they help. Don't if the links will work as links but you can paste into a browser. Do keep posting on here if you need a chat.
mel

The Loners Group
For single, divorced or widdowed caravanners who wish to enjoy caravanning in a friendly and sociable atmosphere.
Membership Secretary: Graham Nelson,
8 Richmond Avenue,
Wrea Green,
Preston,
Lancs PR4 2NJ.
Telephone: 01772-493884,
Mobile: 07932-781485.
Email: lonersgroup@hotmail.co.uk
Website: www.lonersgroup.org.uk

New Companions Club (For those who caravan alone)
The Membership Secretary,
The New Companions Club,
34 The Tinings,
Monkton Park,
Chippenham,
Wiltshire,
SN15 3LZ.Nice People Caravan & Camping Club
Mr Geoff Hargreaves,
101 Arundel Way,
Ipswich IP3 8QHPhoenix Camping Club
Membership is open to single,divorced or widowed campers who live without a partner and camp alone in their own tent, caravan or motor caravan.
For further information, please send a large stamped addressed envelope to:
Mrs Sue Britten,
88 Charfield Drive,
Eggbuckland,
Plymouth,
PL6 5PS
Tel 01752 518669
E mail: sue.britt@btinternet.com

 

[Chris_Hyde_Cheshire.]

David, very sorry to hear of your loss. I can not help with any groups etc, but like Mel said keep logging in for a chat if required and remember all the good times you had together with your wife who you so sadly miss.....

 

[Martin24]

When my wife died at the end of 2009 I had to decide whether to continue caravanning (at 37) with a six year old daughter or not. I was certainly unable to find any clubs that felt suitable for younger people let alone those of us with Children. We went it alone and carried on as normal using our preferred CLs and CSs. I did put an entry on here about setting up a club but there wasn't enough interest. Good luck with all you decide to do.

 

[Dustydog]

When my wife died at the end of 2009 I had to decide whether to continue caravanning (at 37) with a six year old daughter or not. I was certainly unable to find any clubs that felt suitable for younger people let alone those of us with Children. We went it alone and carried on as normal using our preferred CLs and CSs. I did put an entry on here about setting up a club but there wasn't enough interest. Good luck with all you decide to do.

Hi Dave
I came across this lady who takes her children away by herself. http://www.ukcampsite.co.uk/chatter/pop_up_profile.asp?profile=230783
You are not alone mate. Mel had some good ideas.
Best of luck and enjoy the children and the caravan.

 

[farmerdave21]

Hello,
Thanks for your kind comments & replies & thank you to Mel for detailing that information. We used to go away with friends which i will continue to, but not all the times so will probably contact these clubs for information.
And Martin although i have lost the love of my life at age 48 you do find there is always someone worse than yourself it is hard for me but must be worse for you being younger still & having a young child. Life is just so cruel isnt it.
As ive mentioned my wife died of cancer its not really my business how your wife died but i have found the mcmillan forums very helpfull as there are loads of people all suffering like me & you & its comforting to know & talk to people who are experiencing this sad journey.
Best Regards
David

 

[Lord Braykewynde]

Sorry to hear of your sad loss Dave and yours Martin.
I can't help you regarding clubs or contacts but I do know there are lots of caravanners out there who are now single.
Last year at Englethwaite Hall in the time we were there just in our area there was one widower and four widows. The widower got quite friendly with one of the widows (with a bit of encouragement and help from me,a few other campers and the wardens). When having a chat in his caravan he confided that he felt it was too soon after losing his wife but I told him that there's no reason they couldn't be just friends, stay in contact and maybe meet up at other sites. She did ask him to visit her at the next site she was stopping at but his car had broken down. I told him to travel up to Moffat using the mover if he hadn't got his car back. I hope they stayed in contact because she was a very nice elegant lady. Almost aristocratic like myself

 

[Timbo1]

Hello David,
Reading your post I get a sense of you labelling yourself as a specific "type" of caravanner now, and indeed feel the need to target specific clubs for widowed people. I can quite understand you feeling that way and seeking support from those who can truly empathise with your situation having been through it themselves. However, I hope you don't "pidgeonhole" yourself and as a result overlook the sense of belonging afforded by local rallies for instance, where couples, families, singles, young people, retirees all have the opportunity to socialise together. Historically I have experience of single people being embraced by the rallying community and personally it wouldn't make a jot of difference to me if I was sat outside the van on a sunny evening with another couple or a single person - if the company is good its good, however its packaged!

Its very early days for you at the moment David, and I have great admiration that you are focussed on continuing what has been a major part of your life for so many years. I think your caravanning future will be an organic process i.e. it will grow and develop as your new pathway through life is revealed. Sometimes we put too many efforts into trying to make changes to put all the pieces of our lives back into some sort of order when our lives have been turned upside down and everything seems chaotic. I sometimes think all we need do is relax and have faith that things will be well - new doors will open for you of that I'm sure. Maybe your life will never be the same again, but that does not mean to say life will never be good for you again, it will but just in a different way.

May you be truly blessed with new and supportive caravanning friendships wherever you may travel.
Kind regards.

P.S. Have you thought about getting a dog? I don't have one myself but get the impression there's many a friendship struck up over a dog walk.

 

[Dustydog]

Timbo
Those were very kind words you strung together , touched my heart m8

.
P.S. Have you thought about getting a dog? I don't have one myself but get the impression there's many a friendship struck up over a dog walk.
I can confirm these words are more true than you think.
When Pinky and Perky were pups the number of ladies who approached me for a stroke, the dogs that is, was amazing. Even now they seem to attract female attention. I have to be very careful and be a good dog myself or SWMBO will kill me.
A dog well treated and cared for can be very good for children too. Just remember a dog is for life and they are a part of the family. Not just something you stick in the garage when you've finished with it.

 

[Parksy]

Hello David,
Reading your post I get a sense of you labelling yourself as a specific "type" of caravanner now, and indeed feel the need to target specific clubs for widowed people. I can quite understand you feeling that way and seeking support from those who can truly empathise with your situation having been through it themselves. However, I hope you don't "pidgeonhole" yourself and as a result overlook the sense of belonging afforded by local rallies for instance, where couples, families, singles, young people, retirees all have the opportunity to socialise together. Historically I have experience of single people being embraced by the rallying community and personally it wouldn't make a jot of difference to me if I was sat outside the van on a sunny evening with another couple or a single person - if the company is good its good, however its packaged!

Its very early days for you at the moment David, and I have great admiration that you are focussed on continuing what has been a major part of your life for so many years. I think your caravanning future will be an organic process i.e. it will grow and develop as your new pathway through life is revealed. Sometimes we put too many efforts into trying to make changes to put all the pieces of our lives back into some sort of order when our lives have been turned upside down and everything seems chaotic. I sometimes think all we need do is relax and have faith that things will be well - new doors will open for you of that I'm sure. Maybe your life will never be the same again, but that does not mean to say life will never be good for you again, it will but just in a different way.

May you be truly blessed with new and supportive caravanning friendships wherever you may travel.
Kind regards.

P.S. Have you thought about getting a dog? I don't have one myself but get the impression there's many a friendship struck up over a dog walk.

An excellent post very well put Timbo

 

[Timbo1]

Thanks, perhaps I'm at my best at 3 o'clock in the morning!!!

 

[anotherDavid]

Speaking as one who has been there, my advice in addition to the helpful posts about singles rallies etc would be dont do anything drastic. Dont sell the van and dont buy another , it can be a time when serious mistakes can ber made, just keep it simple.
Hope things get better for you
All the best David

 

[anotherDavid]

Duplicate Post

 

[dougie201]

Hi Dave.
Sorry to hear of your sad loss, it must be heartbreaking for you esp when it was so close to christmas. But if you enjoy caravaning then carry on on your own you do not have to join a group. If your family cant be with you then dont despair you will cope on your own , it will be hard but you will cope. I expect you will have a photo of your wife, take this with you and your wife will then be with you in the van and if it helps talk to the photo as if you were talking to her normaly. And as you know caravanners always talk to each other when on site .

Hope things get easier for you, will take a while but time is a great healer.

Dougie....