This call was not to me, but to a good friend and former colleague;
Just had a call from a company informing me that my health and safety certificate for the loft insulation has expired. They will send, at no cost, an engineer round to check and make sure that everything is OK so that they can issue a new certificate.
Firstly, the loft insulation was installed by me and my sons. No H&S certificate was issued as none was requested or required.
Secondly, bad timing, as yesterday I had a surveyor around to issue an EPC (Energy Performance Certificate).
I politely (Honest, I was polite) told the telesales person that I did not require an H&S certificate and did not want an inspection whether it was free or not. All good so far.
Then the young man took me to task and insisted that I explain why I was refusing the inspection. Bad move. I was awake early this morning and have completed all of the days jobs before 10.00am. I haven't had a coffee yet, let alone breakfast. I may have been quicker to react than is normal...
I replied...
"Listen sunshine, I wasn't born yesterday. You get paid for each inspection visit you organise. Your so called inspector is actually a door-stepping salesman who will tell me that my current loft insulation doesn't meet current criteria and needs upgrading. He will then try and flog me some extortionate insulation service...
and before you say anything I had a proper inspector in my property yesterday issuing an EPC... you don't know what an EPC is... what? Anyway, that qualified inspector informed me that my current level of insulation was sufficient and within Government guidelines and any additional insulation would only return marginal benefits.
So go away and leave me alone."
I waited for a few seconds in case he replied. He did not, so I signed off with "Have a nice day!"
😂😂😂