Gordon, I have copied your comment herte so I do not get confused:-
"Thanks, yes I hace checked out pin 3 & 4 on the 12S. I think you are correct its a feature of the electrical/charging system of the caravan. The internal lights are wired only to work of the caravan battery. If I connect the 12S permanent live to the pin that charges the caravan battery presumably the car and the caravan battery would equal themselves out?? This could be a solution for me as long as I kepy an eye on the car battery voltage? Open for suggestions!"
Gordon
If it were me I would get a 3 pole switch with a common centre pole, which can be switched to either of two other poles when switched in either direction. It should be rated at 20A DC and should be available at any car accessory shop.
Locate the cable that feeds the light circuits from your control box, disconnect it and connect it to the centre common pole. Connect one of the other poles to the terminal that the lights supply was connected to and the other to Pin 4 of the 12S.
Ensure that the white wire in the 12S ( pin 3) is connected to the van battery negative [ it may already be connected somewhere].
In one direction of the switch the lights will be connected to the van battery and in the other they will be connected to pin 4.
Ray