Nothing new?

[emmerson]

What's happened to this section of the forum? No new topics since Adam was a boy, and it now seems to have become the "Woosie Club" section. OK for those who are members, but for those of us who aren't, is there nothing new happenning?
This used to be the first section I went for; now its the last, and I know of at least two old members who no longer post, cos there's nothing new Strange isn't it?.Plenty going on on other sections, but not here. My excuse is that my PC wouldn't let me post for a while, but it's fixed now, so look out!

 

[colin-yorkshire1]

hi Emmerson,
This used to be the controversal section untill Parksy cleaned it up

.
So whats new !!! well Nelson Mandella has passed away and so has my uncle Fred and he was 6years older than Nelson

, storms have ravaged britain again so nothing new there, and most peoples vans are laid up for the winter. so it's down to the Woosies to keep things going and going and going like a duracell battery.
of course we could bring back the jokes page " like there were two Lions walking down the main street one said to the other "not many people about is there" er perhaps not!!

.
well it back to hibernation for me see you in the spring!!!!

 

[Dustydog]

Hi Emmo
I guess chit chat can get boring when religion, politics sex are not allowed

However will this sort of thing do

At a nursing home in Birmingham, a group of senior citizens were sitting around talking about their aches and pains.
"My arms are so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one.
"I know what you mean. My cataracts are so bad I can't even see my coffee," replied another.
"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck," said a third, to which several nodded weakly in agreement.
"My blood pressure pills make me dizzy," another contributed.
"I guess that's the price we pay for getting old," winced an old man as he slowly shook his head.
Then there was a short moment of silence.
"Well, it's not that bad," said one woman cheerfully. "Thank God we can all still drive."

 

[Gabsgrandad]

WHY? WHY? WHY?
Well here you are then Emmerson, you're obviously looking for something to do, so here are a few imponderables for you to think about (Obviously not original - but was somwhere back in history) Answers on a postal order please - do we still have them? No politics,religion or sex - sounds boring! But which is the most profound to you etc, which makes you think? Have you answers? if so what are they? Just a few to keep you going.
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a
'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going too?
Once you're in heaven,
do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when
babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a
hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money
in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to
a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid
song about him?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from
morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have
the same tune? Why did you just start singing "Twinkle Twinkle little
star"?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
atmosphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's up your bum?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he
gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out
the window?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the
batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they
know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four hundred billion stars
in our galaxy, and another 300 Billion galaxies... but check when you say the
paint is wet?
Why do they use
sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when
you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the
bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with
their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down
to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your
first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light
fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle
with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all
right?' when it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why
don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's
falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was
in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four
persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three
best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

Pick a subject and discuss ---- And if you can't be bothered - you're not that bored!

 

[Dustydog]

WHY? WHY? WHY?
Well here you are then Emmerson, you're obviously looking for something to do, so here are a few imponderables for you to think about (Obviously not original - but was somwhere back in history) Answers on a postal order please - do we still have them? No politics,religion or sex - sounds boring! But which is the most profound to you etc, which makes you think? Have you answers? if so what are they? Just a few to keep you going.
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going too?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just start singing "Twinkle Twinkle little star"?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the atmosphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's up your bum?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four hundred billion stars in our galaxy, and another 300 Billion galaxies... but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' when it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

Pick a subject and discuss ---- And if you can't be bothered - you're not that bored!

Phew

 

[emmerson]

Now that's better! See, you can do it when prompted, and it knocked the Woosies off the top spot.
As for funny, my lady doctor told me this one: How do you tell the difference between a rectal, and an orasl, thermometer?

The taste

Will that pass the Parksy Pen? Watch this space.
Gabsgrandad, I'm still reading your post!

 

[emmerson]

Ref the ham question in GGs post: my doctor told me once that I had Gammon Flu.

I had had Swine Flu, but now I'm cured!

 

[Parksy]

hi Emmerson,

This used to be the controversal section untill Parksy cleaned it up.......................

Will that pass the Parksy Pen? Watch this space.

Gabsgrandad, I'm still reading your post!

This section was in fact the magazine editors nightmare and I was asked to sort it out which I did.
Sorry and all that, but I didn't find it very entertaining when I had to sit here removing racist rants, comments which alienated and belittled our female forumites and even on occasion repeated images apearing late at night and into the small hours which I had to sit here (instead of going to bed) to collect and save evidence of and then get rid of from the publicly viewed forum, and which eventually resulted in the police having to be informed by Haymarket administrators.
I also had to try to deal with a constant stream of abusive emails from one quarter, and emails complaining bitterly about the free for all comments which created a very poor overall impression of caravan owners from other forum members, many of who vowed never to use this forum again. This was all done in my own time at all hours of the day and night, so harsh as I may sometimes appear, you don't know the half of it.
Jokes, gossip, rumour, general observations about life, pictures of grandkids, tales about your pets plus jokes (liked the ones from Dustydog and about the thermometer

) are all the sorts of things that the editor of Practical Caravan Magazine or Stacie, our community editor would be more than happy to see on this forum and even to publish in the magazine so that you could perhaps win a prize.
When Practical Caravan Magazine decide to print a series of articles about far right political movements, gas chambers for minority groups and capital punishment each month then whoever is the forum moderator can do what they like about allowing that sort of thing to once again besmirch this forum, but I won't be here to worry about it.
Sorry to rant on guys, those who know me and have met me will know that my bark is worse than my bite, but seeing as how my name was mentioned I thought that I'd respond with a healthy dose of the truth

 

[colin-yorkshire1]

hi Emmerson,

This used to be the controversal section untill Parksy cleaned it up.......................

This section was in fact the magazine editors nightmare and I was asked to sort it out which I did.

and a very good job you did at it

, something we should all be eterenally gratefull for, But it is a pity we lost all the wind up merchants as they were good for a laugh, especially when poked with a big stick "eh Parksy"

 

[Parksy]

Thanks Colin.
A lot was going on behind the scenes which I won't go into here, but suffice to say that most if not all of the random wind up merchants who appeared as if out of nowhere originated from one place. 'They' were all one or possibly two persons whose ultimate aim was to manipulate Haymarket into pulling the plug to further their own ends.

I had to laugh myself at times

 

[ProfJohnL]

Hello Parksy,
There is no doubt the forum is much less active than it used to be, and certainly there are far fewer thread being started. It makes me wonder how many members are actually registered now?
It would be nice to see some of the new members actually participating more in some of the threads.

 

[Parksy]

I agree Prof, the forum is very quiet at times and new members who post on here often ask a question and are never heard of again after they have an answer.
This is partly due to the popularity of Facebook, also smartphones are more widely used than computers now for internet access.
Facebook, Twitter etc; lend themselves to use via a mobile phone whereas this forum can be difficult to use or to read through using a mobile smartphone, and editorial staff actively participate more on Facebook than they do on the forum.
This is to do with brand reinforcement and peer to peer advertising rather than any problem with this forum or it's members.
There is no shortage of new members but many browse the website, competitions and blogs but they don't use the forum.
As far as the forum is concerned they are inactive, but from Haymarket's point of view the anonymous browsers still see the adverts and the brand is still reinforced, which is the desired result.
Internet use and social media are constantly evolving which has meant that this forum fulfills a different role to that which it did when it started, this again is nothing to do with the content of the forum.
Even if we went back to the bad old days of moderator baiting, hateful flame bait politics sex and religion, and the sort of personal attacks and bullying coments comments which trashed the reputation of caravanners and the Practical Caravan brand there would be little or no increase in forum traffic.
I'd venture that we'd even lose the valuable forum members who have been so loyal over the years, but it's true that this section could benefit from more content, jokes, pictures, and anything which forum members found amusing or interesting.
Perhaps I ought to 'lift' some of PCv's Facebook material to liven things up a bit

 

[Surfer]

In my opinion I think that one of the biggest drawbacks is not receiving a post notification like on othe caravan forums. You then forget about the post despite having replies and never revisit the forum as you probably never bookmarked it and cannot remeber where you posted. Maybe when you register and post for the first time, there should be a pop up asking if you want to bookmark the page.

 

[Robtel]

What's happened to this section of the forum?

Don't think it is just this section of the forum either Emmerson. Up until this evening it must have been months since I last posted on here, despite visiting the site for a browse virtually every day. Could probably count on the one hand the number of posts I've made in the last year and although never a prolific poster it's a big change from a few years back.
I did have problems getting logged on earlier this year, also problems contacting a moderator though once I did get through to Parksy he had me sorted in no time at all. I wondered at the time if others had experienced similar problems and just gave up. In the past I was more liable to reply to an existing thread rather than start one and I've found over this past year that there just hasnt been many threads I felt I could contribute to. Someone asks a question, normally it is answered pretty quickly so no reason to post the same info twice.
There does seem to be a few of the old stalwarts of the site missing, whether they have given up caravanning, given up posting or as a result of something far more serious, who knows? There used to be a good mixture of good humoured banter plus informative and interesting replies to any threads. I think the site then went through a phase of not so good humoured stuff from one or two wind up merchants plus a couple of posters who I thought were a bit of "know alls". They seem to have moved on but the forum does seem a bit empty, in more ways than one.
Parksy mentions Faceache as being a possible reason. I wouldn't know, don't have an account on there or on Twatter either. I did join Facebook for about a fortnight till I opned it up one evening after I got home from work. Found notificatins from younger colleagues at work wanting to be my "friends"! I had only just left them an hour before and would be seeing them again the next morning, account closed.
Rob

 

[Parksy]

In my opinion I think that one of the biggest drawbacks is not receiving a post notification like on othe caravan forums. You then forget about the post despite having replies and never revisit the forum as you probably never bookmarked it and cannot remeber where you posted. Maybe when you register and post for the first time, there should be a pop up asking if you want to bookmark the page.

I forwarded an email containing a list of things that forum members would like to have on the forum if and when it's modernised and I included email notifications.
Going back to the wind-up merchants that used to plague me and amuse some forum members I don't know what to make of This
If the person asking is genuine, and I've no way of being certain either way, then the replies are not very welcoming, but the guys previous comments which state that he's been a caravanner for all of his life taken with his apparent fondness for guinea pigs appear to suggest a bit of a wind up in progress.

 

[Dustydog]

In my opinion I think that one of the biggest drawbacks is not receiving a post notification like on othe caravan forums. You then forget about the post despite having replies and never revisit the forum as you probably never bookmarked it and cannot remeber where you posted. Maybe when you register and post for the first time, there should be a pop up asking if you want to bookmark the page.

I forwarded an email containing a list of things that forum members would like to have on the forum if and when it's modernised and I included email notifications.
Going back to the wind-up merchants that used to plague me and amuse some forum members I don't know what to make of This
If the person asking is genuine, and I've no way of being certain either way, then the replies are not very welcoming, but the guys previous comments which state that he's been a caravanner for all of his life taken with his apparent fondness for guinea pigs appear to suggest a bit of a wind up in progress.

Anyone who flits from Audi A4's to Autocruise motorhomes for towing a TA can't be serious or can he / she

 

[Martin24]

No they can't be serious in any of their posts