Overstaying your Welcome

[Parksy]

Quote Parksy .. "Maybe the fire crew turned on their floodlights in an effort to distinguish between Arthur and Martha? They could also have been looking for a lost dog".

It wasn't just the floodlights they got into trouble for. It was because they turned their hose on Arthur and Martha to try and 'extinguish' them. I suppose that's where the pastime gets its canine name from :O)

Regards, Uncle Windy.

I'm glad that you wrote about the hosepipe and not me!

It crossed my mind that a bucket of water might have been appropriate at the time but I hesitated to write it.

 

[Parksy]

Now there's an idea Lisa.

Anthony could slap some genetian violet on himself and his other half and keep scratching. It would be a very thick skinned guest who would stay for very long

 

[Lord Braykewynde]

But you caught crabs when you were a small boy. I remember you writing about it.

Lisa

That's correct. From The Point at Ingoldmells :O)

.... and an eel.

 

[ANTHONYB1]

Hi Anthony,

I think you are missing a trick here. Leave him in your van and go and see his missus.

Hello Pat,You would have to be a brave or foolish man to go near his misses,

Regards Anthony

 

[ANTHONYB1]

Hello everyone,Iam really enjoying the thought of trying some of the suggestions,although not the ones in the woods,nor the crabs one,hes not big on personel hygeine,he still has a bottle of BRUT circa 1985 unopened.Keep the ideas coming.

Regards Anthony.

 

[LMH]

Parksy

'genetian violet' - have you been speaking to my Phil? He used that by the bucket full on the greyhounds........

LB - I forgot about the eel.

Anthony, have you thought about having plastic surgery? He won't recognise you then. Just get your wife to wear a scarf across her face too.

Lisa

 

[machighlander]

Hi Anthony,

try this yin.

You get steamin foo wi the drink before cadger comes along, then ye will hav the dutch courage to tell him wher tae go, or alternatively, *** round an see his wee lass. that should sort it.

 

[Parksy]

Another suggestion for Anthony would be to invite my ex wife round, he'd soon take his hook then!

 

[Pat_374304630]

Anthony,

Invite his missus over, that way he might go back to his van and watch telly.

 

[Dustydog]

Anthony

Get a dirty shaggy,hair falling out, bad breath, flatulent dog that likes jumping up on people.

Cheers

Dustydog

 

[Pat_374304630]

If you are getting your bed ready then why not take off all your clothes and then look at him in the eye !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[LMH]

Anthony, I couldn't sleep last night for worrying about your predicament. I have a sewing machine and knocked this up for you. The model is a friend.

There's no need to thank me, I'm just looking after a fellow caravanner.

He'll never recognise you now if you wear this on the campsite.

Lisa

 

[ANTHONYB1]

Hello everyone, Thanks for the many contructive and weird suggestions,points have been noted for the future.We now have about 5 months respite before the next season starts,maybe I will have to change clubs and venues, only time will tell.

Best Regards to everybody

Anthony.

 

[Guest]

Just tell him straight. Messing about never works.

Time to leave, get him by the collar if he looks like he's not going to move!

"B****r off now I'm going to bed" works well