Training course for Men

[CliveV]

W.I.C.O.E.

(Women In Charge Of Everything)

is proud to announce the opening of its

EVENING CLASSES FOR THE PROPER TRAINING OF WE MEN !

OBVIOUSLY THE COURSE IS OPEN TO MEN ONLY

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS

Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS -- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?

Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR

Practicing with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?

Debate among a panel of experts.

REMOTE CONTROL

Losing the remote control - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS

Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming - Open forum

DAY TWO

EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?

Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH

PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST

Real life testimonial from the one man who did

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?

Driving simulation

LIVING WITH ADULTS; BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER

Online class and role playing

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION

Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE

Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME

Individual counselors available

LIMITED AVAILABILITY, SO APPLY AS SOON AS YOU CAN.

 

[cris_408518]

Whilst attending the wife or lady partner could go to the class for women next door!

1.Freezer space management related to Ice Cubes being a necessity! Lecture

2.Reality lesson related to colour co-ordination of toilet rolls.

Buy the cheaper stuff! No ond gives a S*** that the coulour not matching the curtains or tile border!

3.Fitness and Awareness seminar.

Contents re, benefits of bending and excersize incorporated into womens work. Awareness re the fact that the machine washes the clothes so you need the excersize that will enable you to cut down on trips to Gym and fitness classes. More money saved!

4. Observational video and class re benefits of kebabs, fish n chips and burgers etc as finger food combined with drinking from bottles and cans. Assesment of time management results in little cutlery or crockery leaving the kitchen.

5. Awareness and Reality class followed by lesson showing that even quite simple minded people can use teletext and set a video with a remote control let alone intelligent modern day women.

6. Space and object awareness re keys and shoes etc in unusual places and your ability to actually move them to their correct homes without the man of the house doing it!

Day 2.

1. Scissor and knife use class combined with Health and Safety awareness. Practical demonstration on reading and understanding opening instructions and practical demonstration on opening cartons, packets, jars, bags and corned beef tins.

2. Guilt anf Gift talk by Psychologist --- Receiving flowers chocolates etc does not mean a man is automatically guilty of anything!

3. Map management and naviation class.

Stress and fear managemt re driving further than the School , Shops, Gym , Best Friends house or your mums.

Lesson on how to read fuel gauge, fill fuel tank and practical instruction on fuel pump hoses reaching to far side of car and fact that you don't have to queue for ten minutes for a pump on the same side as your filler cap.

4. Highway code refresher course. Reversing and parallel parking are every day driving practice NOT JUST driving test one off requirement.

5. Eyes hands and mirrors when driving, video and discussion forum!

Eyes on road and looking for other road users,not checking nail varnish colour.

Mirrors not for checking how you look or where you are putting lippy or eye make up.

Two hand for driving not one for make up, hairbrush or adjusting clothing.

6. Size awareness between you and partner. It is possible to adjust car seat and mirors when driving shared car!

7. Self control and budgeting lesson re shopping.

You don't have to have a man with you to impose control.

8. Seminar re practical memory facts.

ie

You are not always right nor do you remember everything!

 

[Wendy-Norfolk]

Whilst attending the wife or lady partner could go to the class for women next door!

1.Freezer space management related to Ice Cubes being a necessity! Lecture

2.Reality lesson related to colour co-ordination of toilet rolls.

Buy the cheaper stuff! No ond gives a S*** that the coulour not matching the curtains or tile border!

3.Fitness and Awareness seminar.

Contents re, benefits of bending and excersize incorporated into womens work. Awareness re the fact that the machine washes the clothes so you need the excersize that will enable you to cut down on trips to Gym and fitness classes. More money saved!

4. Observational video and class re benefits of kebabs, fish n chips and burgers etc as finger food combined with drinking from bottles and cans. Assesment of time management results in little cutlery or crockery leaving the kitchen.

5. Awareness and Reality class followed by lesson showing that even quite simple minded people can use teletext and set a video with a remote control let alone intelligent modern day women.

6. Space and object awareness re keys and shoes etc in unusual places and your ability to actually move them to their correct homes without the man of the house doing it!

Day 2.

1. Scissor and knife use class combined with Health and Safety awareness. Practical demonstration on reading and understanding opening instructions and practical demonstration on opening cartons, packets, jars, bags and corned beef tins.

2. Guilt anf Gift talk by Psychologist --- Receiving flowers chocolates etc does not mean a man is automatically guilty of anything!

3. Map management and naviation class.

Stress and fear managemt re driving further than the School , Shops, Gym , Best Friends house or your mums.

Lesson on how to read fuel gauge, fill fuel tank and practical instruction on fuel pump hoses reaching to far side of car and fact that you don't have to queue for ten minutes for a pump on the same side as your filler cap.

4. Highway code refresher course. Reversing and parallel parking are every day driving practice NOT JUST driving test one off requirement.

5. Eyes hands and mirrors when driving, video and discussion forum!

Eyes on road and looking for other road users,not checking nail varnish colour.

Mirrors not for checking how you look or where you are putting lippy or eye make up.

Two hand for driving not one for make up, hairbrush or adjusting clothing.

6. Size awareness between you and partner. It is possible to adjust car seat and mirors when driving shared car!

7. Self control and budgeting lesson re shopping.

You don't have to have a man with you to impose control.

8. Seminar re practical memory facts.

ie

You are not always right nor do you remember everything!

Oooooh your poor wife/partner - looks as if she can't do anything right!!! :O(

 

[trucker]

Oooooh your poor wife/partner - looks as if she can't do anything right!!! :O(

Wendy please. It was a joke (if you read down) on both sides!

 

[cris_408518]

Oooooh your poor wife/partner - looks as if she can't do anything right!!! :O(

Wendy. Mrs cris has been driving longer than me and hates women drivers in general. The 1st and last time I saw her in make up was the day we got married she can't stand our lovely daughters "faffing around with war paint". She also earns a lot more money and is far far cleverer than me and has a numerous Uni degrees etc to prove it. All her lady colleagues are jealous as hell of her complexion and natural blonde hair even though she is the wrong side of 50 like me.

As I work from home a lot of the time I do the washing, ironing, cooking and make the beds and she prefers my cooking to most of her friends and families.

She tows the van as well as my commercial trailer but prefers driving fast! Don't even ask about that!

We both pick things up for the other and put them away and we very rarely argue. She will also decorate, fits hinges and doors etc as well as me and has even built her own garden walls as she enjoyed helping me build the garage and office years ago, when I failed at plastering she had a go but we are equally as bad! And she spends the money as she is better at it than me when it comes to getting bargains!