What should we do?

[Andrew_5105555]

This is non caravan related question but i have a dilemma.We are a married couple with two children aged 2+10yrs,we live in Lancashire but for the last 5yrs we have been thinking of upping sticks with a move to Cornwall,anyway i have done some ringing around with the company i work for and can get a job no problem my wife works in retail and we can manage with my wages until something comes up.Has anybody else made a similar life change?If so any honest advise would be appreciated.Anyway back to the problem we live close the childrens Gran(my mum)and they see her 2-3 days per week,i know if i said we where moving away she would say go and don't worry about me(thats what she is like)but i know she would be devastated+miss her grandchildren.This is stopping us jumping at the chance and thinking of not doing it.What do you fellow vaners think?

Thanks

Andrew+Nic

 

[gavin_5121842]

One obvious solution is for you Mum to sell up and move too. You could even buy a home with a 'granny flat' That way you've got a baby sitter whenever you need one too!

Gavin.

 

[jayne2]

hiya, 20 years ago we, husband i and 2 children [age 6 & 4]moved from london to basildon not far, but upheaval the same, mums not round corner etc., and although was able to see parents and in-laws every three weeks or so, the independant living of our family was the best thing, children had a better life, as many parks around, close to beach, and during summer i made more effort to take them around essex rather than just to mums, all in all a good move, eldest daughter thinking about moving to lincolnshire with her family, so she must have seen her experience as positve, and now she is talking about doing the same as we did, and leaving us behind i also say go for it, don't look back at the 'might have beens' life is too short for regrets

 

[GillC1]

Andrew,

I have done exactly what you are thinking of doing. I am married we have two children now 15 and 13 we lived in Essex. Four years ago we came to south wales for a weekend in the caravan April time, viewed a new building development liked it, we went back home put our house on the market and moved here in the following october.

Non of us had jobs when we moved. We had enough money to last a couple months before finding jobs but my husband is a lorry driver and found work within 3 days.

Both my husband and i have parents and brothers and sisters still in essex. The hardest thing is saying goodbye when you have visited.

At the time we moved our children were 10 and 12 if we hadn't have done it then we would never have done it.

Our first thought was to give it a full year before making any decision as to whether it was right, but after a few weeks we knew this was home and now i can't see us ever returning.

It is a big decision but if you don't do it you will always wonder what if?

We feel this is a much better enviroment to bring up our children,

Feel free to ask any questions you may have i will try to help

 

[LizCornwall]

Hi Andrew, As you can see from my user name Liz(Cornwall)

This is my name and where I live.

I am not Cornish, I am a Londerer,

I moved down here with my parents who had retired and my brother this was in the 70's.

Brother and myself both gave up our good jobs, to have a better life down here in Cornwall, and of course giving our parents a better retirement life.

To be Honest with you nobody could advise you, to make the move.

We moved as a whole family, with my sister already married and living down in Cornwall in the 60's, so we left London with no family there.

All I can say I would not go back and live in London, I might consider Bournemouth where my husband comes from.

Regards Liz

 

[Lol1]

Any particular reason for Cornwall, Andrew?

 

[cris_408518]

If you are away from you family safety net things may not be so easy, you could also find that you are not that welcome.

Our old neighbours moved to Cornwall four years ago and have moved back to Berkshire, they had family who had sought an idylic dream and moved there years ago, their kids had to leave to find work when they were old enough so they have now moved to Hertfordshire and both couples have been hit badly in the property stakes.

Liz had family their and took family with her, we had sociable friends who moved to the Isle of white afteer holidaying there for many years. They were made to feel complete outsiders and it ruined their retirement.

 

[GillC1]

If you are away from you family safety net things may not be so easy, you could also find that you are not that welcome.

Our old neighbours moved to Cornwall four years ago and have moved back to Berkshire, they had family who had sought an idylic dream and moved there years ago, their kids had to leave to find work when they were old enough so they have now moved to Hertfordshire and both couples have been hit badly in the property stakes.

Liz had family their and took family with her, we had sociable friends who moved to the Isle of white afteer holidaying there for many years. They were made to feel complete outsiders and it ruined their retirement.

chris,

i hear what you say but being the outsider you do have to make an extra effort, joining in things etc. having young children helped us

 

[LizCornwall]

Good points raised cris,

Andrew you have young children, they will have to attend school, my daughter did from the age of 5 years onwards, a lot of parents moved away back home, because of missing the family ties etc, as you can appreciate most cornish folk never move away from the area, so their children's children attended schools, grandparents, parents attended the same school, so quite rightly so we are outsiders to cornish folk.

Regards Liz

 

[Garfield]

This is an interesting post to us, we live near Whitby N. Yorks, which is only 30 miles from my place of birth, we have a very nice, large house and two holiday cottages on a large plot on the edge of a village just a few hundred yards from the sea.

Sounds fantastic, but for a working couple with a young family, after being here for 3 years we feel quite isolated, the surrounding area is actually quite deprived and finding like minded freinds that do not already have a full social life is difficult.

There is little or nothing in the way of prospects for our children in the local area.

We are actually quite envious of one couple we know who live just a few minutes from both sets of parents that they get on with well as well as having a good network of freinds in the area.

Another couple who were forced to move away with work bought a new house in a cul de sac development on the dge of a large village have settled in well as all the surrounding neighbours were also new to the village and keen to make freinds.

We have recently looked into relocating, but for the moment the alternatives do not offer any guarantee of being any better.

I nearly posted a very similar post myself, we were thinking of Derbyshire.

 

[MrsMothy]

If you don't do it, maybe you will regret it. You must be considering this because it could be right for you. If it doesn't work out, you could always look to move back.

 

[chelsea1]

I think you should go for your dream, my outlook on life is - you only have 1 and should live it to the full. Try it - if it doesnt work out - you still have your family and that is the most important thing. At least 10 years down the line you wont have any regrets or any "if onlys" "i wished we did that". Its not like your emigrating to the other side of the world either.

Just some advice - me and my hubby are Devonians - born and bred - life is great here, countryside, low crime etc - but it is VERY expensive to live down here - we pay high council tax (for nothing really - as we live in a rural area with no local facilites), Water rates are very high, house prices have rocketed (you'll pay

 

[Andrew_5105555]

Hi Liz(cornwall) i must admit it is worry to me with regard to fitting in and being accepted,i sometimes work in the North wales area and it is a similar situation with people moving to certain areas and villages.What is the schooling/crime like in Cornwall,the area the job is at is in the West Cornwall it is a home based mobile job so i am quite flexible with location.We visit West Cornwall a couple of times a year nd have been looking at villages in land from St Austell e.g Roche,St davids,Penwithick etc.I don't know your location but do you know much about these areas?

Gary your experience has highlighted a few good points i have visited the Whitby area many times with my van and always found it lovely part of the country,do you find that it is local people that will not mix with outsiders and make it difficult to settle in due to rising house prices+lack of jobs?

 

[parker1158]

Hi Andrew

The reverse situation happened to us. My wife and her four sisters always stayed in Northamptonshire to keep the family together. When my father-in-law retired at 60 they promptly announced (within days!) that they had put the house on the market and were going to move to Poole (Where they originally came from).

Soon after the sisters all moved to far flung places and wished they had done it sooner if they had known.

My wife recons she sees her parents more now they are in Poole than when they were 12 miles away. It used to be an hour or so every fortnight we now go down to Poole for long weekends (Or more if we take the van) every month.

I say go for it, modern England is so much smaller with modern travel you are never that far away.

 

[LizCornwall]

Hi Andrew,

We live now just outside Truro, not a village, where I am site warden of a Private Caravan and Camping Holiday Park.

When we first moved down here we moved from London to St.Austell, to this day my brother still lives there bearing in mind no mortgage, which made life easier, we both got jobs quite easy, but bearing in mind wages not so good, but a much better way of life.

Now myself I got married in St.Austell but moved to Bournemouth where my husband was born,

We then decided to move back to Cornwall due to mum dieing , by this time we had a daughter, who was due to start school, at the time we found a place in a village in North Cornwall, problem most parents face in a village life, children attending school with local children, they were picked up no always by the parents, but they had uncles, aunties, and Grandparents to pick them up, and also go to stay a Grandparents house for tea etc, this can be very hurtful to some children if they have no family here.

What I am saying is if your leaving your children's Grandparent behind or other family members, they might feel left out, especially if what you say they visit your mum on a regular basis.

If anything to be honest with you, if you really decide that's best for your family to move to Cornwall try a town, rather than a village school.

Penwithick, Stenaless,Roche, they are all villages.

Crime down here nothing to worry about, that's why it's a nice place to live. I have no problems, daughter now 17years old, no worries she goes into town on bus on her own .

As I said previous I would not move back to London, quite like Bournemouth, but I will have to save up my pennies.

If you would like to speak to me more about living or any others concerns you have, you could ask Moderator to send me your email address or visa versa, I do not mind.

Regards Liz

 

[KiwiPete]

Hi Andrew, As you can see from my user name Liz(Cornwall)

This is my name and where I live.

I am not Cornish, I am a Londerer,

I moved down here with my parents who had retired and my brother this was in the 70's.

Brother and myself both gave up our good jobs, to have a better life down here in Cornwall, and of course giving our parents a better retirement life.

To be Honest with you nobody could advise you, to make the move.

We moved as a whole family, with my sister already married and living down in Cornwall in the 60's, so we left London with no family there.

All I can say I would not go back and live in London, I might consider Bournemouth where my husband comes from.

Regards Liz

I too am from Bournemouth and went to Summerbee Secondary School. I wonder if I know your significant other Liz?

 

[LizCornwall]

I too am from Bournemouth and went to Summerbee Secondary School. I wonder if I know your significant other Liz?

Although hubby was born in Bournemouth, his family moved to Poole, thats where he attended school, but when we lived there for a few years after getting married in St.Austell, we lived in Bournemouth the area I liked, but a little too expensive.

Hence I will have to save my pennies or win the lottery, to move back.

Regards Liz

 

[cris_408518]

You have to remember that very many families like me and mine got on our bikes to find work and left the south west, you can be the most community minded sociable person going but if the locals are not prepared to accept outsiders things can be difficult.

Some employees will accept workers from "outside" others will make it very difficult for you. We know people who have done the emigration dream to various destinations and returned as the pressures of being outsiders at work for one of the partners, bullying at school for outsider kids and rejection by the local community.

The cost of return to "home" has also lead to divorce.

I have friends who moved to Tuscany and have been made very welcome and are living their dreams, friend of theirs moved to avillage about 50 miles from them and have been rejected by the locals and spent two years trying to sell up and have lost

 

[Barry_5132760]

I have been watching this topic with a great deal of interest.

We got away from the rat race but in the opposite direction, by buying and moving to Orkney from Yorkshire 5 years ago after spending one holiday up here. Neither of us had jobs when we moved and I found it much harder to find work than my wife (she is a secretary, I am an auditor). At the time, our son and his family lived in Aberdeen, but 2 years ago, they moved to Sheffield through work - almost to where we came here from.

On the negative front, we feel isolated from family at times and travel off-island is expensive and/or slow - it costs us more to fly from Orkney to Manchester than it would cost to fly from Manchester to New York! The weather in Winter can be appalling which makes our heating bills very expensive, typically

 

[chelsea1]

You have to remember that very many families like me and mine got on our bikes to find work and left the south west, you can be the most community minded sociable person going but if the locals are not prepared to accept outsiders things can be difficult.

Some employees will accept workers from "outside" others will make it very difficult for you. We know people who have done the emigration dream to various destinations and returned as the pressures of being outsiders at work for one of the partners, bullying at school for outsider kids and rejection by the local community.

The cost of return to "home" has also lead to divorce.

I have friends who moved to Tuscany and have been made very welcome and are living their dreams, friend of theirs moved to avillage about 50 miles from them and have been rejected by the locals and spent two years trying to sell up and have lost

 

[chelsea1]

 

[cris_408518]

You have to remember that very many families like me and mine got on our bikes to find work and left the south west, you can be the most community minded sociable person going but if the locals are not prepared to accept outsiders things can be difficult.

Some employees will accept workers from "outside" others will make it very difficult for you. We know people who have done the emigration dream to various destinations and returned as the pressures of being outsiders at work for one of the partners, bullying at school for outsider kids and rejection by the local community.

The cost of return to "home" has also lead to divorce.

I have friends who moved to Tuscany and have been made very welcome and are living their dreams, friend of theirs moved to avillage about 50 miles from them and have been rejected by the locals and spent two years trying to sell up and have lost

 

[Garfield]

Firstly, the house prices in the south west as here in N. Yorks when compared to average income are not cheap, in real terms for young families they are as expensive as home counties prices due to the high number being bought up as holiday homes and retirement homes, our two cottages only have planning consent for holiday homes and we stive to fill them year round, contributing to the local economy.

House prices are very compressed, ie a 2bed shabby cottage will cost

 

[cris_408518]

You would be welcome Wayne but we bought direct from the late owners daughter for quick sale as I own the house next door.

 

[Moderator2_5083849]

I apologise if the last posting seems to be random, but having deleted a post by "wayne" for not conforming to the forum rules, it would appear to have left an out of place reply.

To claify the reply, the question was,,,,how did you (cris) manage to buy a cottage for 150k