hi Annie,
while it may seem the answers you received were in the form of a question without a recommendation or specific answer may seem odd but in reality nose weight is one of the subjects that come up time and again.
and to be honest there is no single answer that will solve all the problems.
the fact of the matter is nose weight criteria is different depending on what the outfit dictates, in the end it comes down to loading, but the start point can be very different.
where basic equipment is on the van will dictate the start point like position of cooker heater gas bottles battery and spare wheel, what we put in the van also alters the nose weight, it is suprising how much difference moving things around make start with all the stuff in the front locker most of us just chuck loads of stuff in there it all adds to the nose weight a EHU 25mtr cable is about 8/10kg so moving it from the front box to the rear floor of the van changes the balance on the axle [assuming it is a single axle] by 16/20kg a awning and poles carried on the floor over the axles moved backwards by a foot or so will lose another 10kg, or even filling the toilet rinse tank with fluid makes a difference if it is at the rear of the van.
it is really just a case of loading the van differently from the way you used to do it to get the weight down for the new car just keep all heavy items on the floor as near to the axles as possible and shifting things around to get it right.
note, I had a van with a dry[empty] nose weight of 105kg that had to be got down 50kg [the max for the car] fully loaded so it is possible.
btw, could I suggest you try a different method of testing other than using a stick, it could be quite nasty if the stick flies up, try using the caravan step as a stable platform with the scales on top and wood blocks to make up the difference, get the van level and zero the scales before winding the jockey wheel up and check the weight this way.
it is more accurate and less chance of taking a injury away with you on holiday, ps, [got that T shirt as well]