And then it started !

[JohnnyV]

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed

the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.

I hooked up the boat up to the car, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the

garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.

I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and

whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'

My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'

And then the fight started ..

 

[mcghee]

so thats why she text me and said not to come round.

my key was almost in the door

 

[dazber]

olden but golden..

but nevertheless... funny

 

[Olly]

My wife sat next to me on the settee as I was flipping through the TV channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

My wife and I were lying in bed watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" when I turned to her and said,

"Do you want to have sex?"

"No," she answered.

I then said, "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes."

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion and I kept staring at a drunken woman swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, she's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' said my wife, 'who would believe that a person could go on celebrating for that long?'

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

I took my wife to a restaurant and for some reason, the waiter took my order first.

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."

He said; 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her somewhere expensive so I drove down to the local petrol station.

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

A woman is standing in the nude, looking at her reflection in the bedroom mirror.

She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband; 'I feel horrible. I look old, fat and ugly. I really need for you to pay me a compliment.'

The husband replies; 'Well, your eyesight's still damn near perfect.'

And that's when the fight started.!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------