Advice on texting.

Jun 16, 2020
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I recently made a faux pas while texting. So I am writing to warn others.

What happened?

My wife had a text from a granddaughter.

“I am going to Ikea, anyone want anything?”

I used my wife's phone to answer as she was busy.

“No thanks.”

Today I discovered I had made a number of mistakes. Turns out she was a bit upset as there were no kisses. She even asked her dad if she had upset her gran. My son guessed that it was me that I had written it.

Evidently, No thanks is too abrupt. And not friendly. But even worse it seems, was the full stop. It seems that this adds to the abruptness.

Today I said to her, you asked a question and I gave you a nice clear, concise, polite answer, with punctuation. What else could you expect? Later I told her brother's boyfriend who also said my text was abrupt and full stops are a definite no-no.

She then told me she was trying to get her dad to stop using 👍 to answer some texts, (another thing I do). Also not proper etiquette.

Touchy people.

John
 
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Perhaps the youngsters might be a bit less sensitive and more understanding of other people and not expect everyone to fall in line with their habits. Must admit my kids and grandkids have never mentioned my etiquette even when I used an avocado emoji to add to my shopping list for daughter to buy for a bbq. 🤣

My devices seem to insert full stops at will………❄️❄️
 
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Mel

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Once went to a work related training session on the use of social media and texting in Child exploitation. An eye opener if somewhat horrifying.
One thing I did learn was NEVER use any vegetable based emojis in a text. 😲
Mel
 
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I am always short & curt with texts as they are a text in black & white and not a conversation. Don't see any point in adding heart and kiss emotions. After all if they loved you they should be speaking to you rather than texting.

Not sure why why anyone would get upset because they do not have the courtesy to speak to the person preferring text. Perhaps they lack the courtesy or do not know how to greet the person to whom they are speaking and to say Good bye at end of conversation. Have the younger generation lost the art of conversation?

Understandable using text or Whatsapp text if they are overseas as voice calls could be very expensive.
 
Jun 20, 2005
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“Understandable using text or Whatsapp text if they are overseas as voice calls could be very expensive”
lest we forget the telegram.
 
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I regularly text the kids or grandkids as I don’t know what they are doing work wise or where they are so a phone call could be intrusive. But we also talk a lot too. That’s why most of our tv viewing is off the recorder or IPlayer.
 
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Never heard of the problem. We use text messages like that all the time and no one has ever said I was wrong. To be honest most would expect them to be concise and punctuated.
 
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Never heard of the problem. We use text messages like that all the time and no one has ever said I was wrong. To be honest most would expect them to be concise and punctuated.
The granddaughter who took a little offense from my text is 27, but extremely tech-savvy, she makes the iPhone sing and sorts out lots of issues for me.

I feel that amongst her age group, the ‘correct’ (as they see it), etiquette for texting is developing into a language of its own.

The next time I reply to a text from her it will be a diatribe lacking in punctuation but with plenty of emojis.

John
 
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The granddaughter who took a little offense from my text is 27, but extremely tech-savvy, she makes the iPhone sing and sorts out lots of issues for me.

I feel that amongst her age group, the ‘correct’ (as they see it), etiquette for texting is developing into a language of its own.

The next time I reply to a text from her it will be a diatribe lacking in punctuation but with plenty of emojis.

John
You won’t win, as each age group tend to have their own preferred approach, but at 27 years old I’d have thought that she was above such issues with you.
 
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I just did a little research on my faux pas and came up with this.


seems my granddaughter is spot on, and I am completely out of date.

She will definitely have to make some allowances for me.

On a similar vein. I was always taught to put two spaces after a full stop within a paragraph. I still think it improves the overall presentation. Evidently, this is also out of date. At least according the Jenny The Vixen Ryan who said using two spaces drives her wild.

John
 
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I'm "only" 54 but already concluded that I just can't (can't be bothered?) trying to keep up with the ever changing world around us. I just do my best at all times and if I get it wrong then so-be-it. I did all of my learning in my earlier years, I just want to spend the next few years enjoying myself rather than trying to re-learn everything that I have previously accepted as correct.
 
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Same granddaughter. Just heard she has got a great desl on a new cake mixer. £200 instead of £450

Then she posted her latest results for her OU degree.

Rhi.jpg

So I replied with this:

Rhi 2.jpg

At least she appreciated it. Love her.

John
 
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I just did a little research on my faux pas and came up with this.


seems my granddaughter is spot on, and I am completely out of date.

She will definitely have to make some allowances for me.

On a similar vein. I was always taught to put two spaces after a full stop within a paragraph. I still think it improves the overall presentation. Evidently, this is also out of date. At least according the Jenny The Vixen Ryan who said using two spaces drives her wild.

John
The description in paragraph 1 seems a rather extreme example of how a full stop might make youngsters feel.

We have a dining in night tonight at our grandsons to celebrate his new job and new house., and our son is visiting too. So I will ask the views of the 18/20 year olds, daughter and son , as well as grandson and his partner. There will be Baby Boomers, Generation X, Millennials and Centennials all eating Domino’s and socialising so I know I may upset some when my order is a hot jalapeño pizza that no one else likes or wants to share. Although I like their choices 😂

But wrt text etiquette I will tell them I can live without their punctuation or grammar, and accept their abbreviations, but incorrect spelling really wizzes grandad off.
 
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Same granddaughter. Just heard she has got a great desl on a new cake mixer. £200 instead of £450

Then she posted her latest results for her OU degree.

View attachment 5766

So I replied with this:

View attachment 5767

At least she appreciated it. Love her.

John
What a coincidence our daughter has graduated this summer with an OU BSc degree in Mental Health Nursing with the same grade. She’s planning to enroll with OU for her Masters.

When I was at work I always had a high regard for staff doing OU degrees or candidates for positions who were OU graduates. It’s not easy doing a degree along with working and/or raising a family.
 
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What a coincidence our daughter has graduated this summer with an OU BSc degree in Mental Health Nursing with the same grade. She’s planning to enrol with OU for her Masters.

When I was at work I always had a high regard for staff doing OU degrees or candidates for positions who were OU graduates. It’s not easy doing a degree along with working and/or raising a family.
That is now 3 grandchildren who have got degrees in the past year. The one who got hers today did the same course as her older sister and they worked together. Extremely hard work for them especially as one has two kids to consider.

A grandson also passed construction management with honours from Reading. He did his as a degree apprentice. So got paid good money while doing it. That is by far the best way to do a degree.

I did similar for a HNC then later a CertEd (FE)

John
 
Jun 20, 2005
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What a coincidence our daughter has graduated this summer with an OU BSc degree in Mental Health Nursing with the same grade. She’s planning to enroll with OU for her Masters.

When I was at work I always had a high regard for staff doing OU degrees or candidates for positions who were OU graduates. It’s not easy doing a degree along with working and/or raising a family.
I think the OU had just opened when I started work. But we we were given half a day on the job training and all fees paid at UCL for the Fellowship exams. In addition we were attached to a mentor for six months each department learning on the job. I wonder how those who work from home learn from their peers? Can’t be easy.
 

JTQ

May 7, 2005
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IMO this getting hung up with this new etiquette based on corrupting our grammar, is rather more their problem than mine.
Not that in a lifetime I have managed to master getting it right by any means, way too challenging with rules that can or do not apply
Surely at the end of the day it is just a "vehicle" to communicate with? If it achieves that, job done.
 
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Two 18 year olds, and two thirty somethings all agreed that putting a full stop at the end of a ” social” text is a no no. But full stops in the sentences within that text are fine. Our son and daughter born early to mid seventies weren’t aware and as one said ”I don't give a ****”
 
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