I'm standing for election for the leadership of the MRLP. I will carry on the fine tradition of my late peer of the realm colleague. I will stand against Brown because Blair won't be here then. VOTE TRUMPING LORD BRAYKEWYNDE. All asylum seekers (economic migrants) will be given a one way Euro Star ticket to Brussels. There will be dog toilets on every street corner and drains under every tree. I will abolish the probation service and with the money saved build more jails. I will also abolish the Social Services and replace it with a service that genuinely looks after the needy and not offenders. I will set up a counselling service for those who have lost loved ones due to bombings, murders of all kinds and victims of rape and aquire all the assetts of the offenders to pay the victims families. There will be no sitting talking to rapists and murderers trying to make them see the errors of their ways. Its been tried for far to long in this Namby Pamby country of ours - IT DOES NOT WORK. I will introduce Sharia law for those who are muslims, after all they want all other practices instilled into this Christian country. We are self sufficient in cows in the U.K. so will propose that within 10 years all vehicles will run on Methane. The only cost to the motorist will be to buy the sacks of cow dung from the farmer, V.A.T. free. We will put every citizen through college so that if they have any minor illness's/ailments they can treat themselves instead of taking up Doctors precious time with diahorhea, thrush, a cough, nose runs etc. Regarding Hospitals the first 26 tiers of management will be replaced by a Matron and a non paid committee of staff from the hospital, made up from all departments rather than hospital managers who transferred from Tesco, Woolworths etc. So that we can have a fuel mountain, just incase foot and mouth strikes again, I will abolish all local lorry transport and use mule and cart. The mule dung can then be stored at local fuel depots. In agriculture tractors will be abolished and we will revert to the bullock and plough. The money saved on fertilisers, because the bullock fertilises as it works, can be used to replenish the forests we have lost. Anyone even complaining that something isn't Politically Correct will receive an automatic one week gaol sentence. POLITICAL CORRECTNESS will be a thing of the past. People who come to live in this country will live here on OUR terms, not theirs and if they have no job to come too they simply don't come. They will be turned back at the ports. Go now wherever you are and stand on street corners, in your High St. and shout THE MONSTER RAVING LOONY PARTY IS ABOUT TO BE REBORN. BRAYKEWYNDE FOR A HEALTHIER FUTURE.