Woosie Club

[Martin24]

Urghhhhhhhhh that's even worse than shop bought bread or ice cream 🤢

 

[Gagakev]

Urghhhhhhhhh that's even worse than shop bought bread or ice cream 🤢

Didnt say I liked them :evil:
In fact they are disgusting, I tried one of the grandkids a couple of years ago. :dry:

 

[Martin24]

I can imagine that children would probably like them.

 

[Anseo]

Application for membership to the Woosie Club.​

Curriculum Vitae:​

1. Stopped for a pee in the middle of nowhere, dog pressed the button and locked the car keys inside and me outside , mobile phone in car, my dog (below average intelligence) could not figure out how to wind down a window or open a door, stone through passenger door window, my idea of 'sorted'.

2. Prelude: I had been 'planning :evil: ' and was looking forward to be going away for a couple of days on my own when at the last minute (so to speak) my wife decided she would come with me.
So there I was, driving along, when I had a call from my wife saying she could not find our car or caravan in the very large parking area of a hypermarket, it took me 30 minutes to get back to the carpark (and my wife), I told her I thought I had time to go and get fuel before she finished shopping, I "explained" that there had been a problem with the electricity supplying the fuel pumps, hence the delay 😗
The game was up when I had to stop for fuel about an hour and a half later 😱hmy:.

3. I didn't fancy putting the awning up so left it stored inside its bag, on the ground under the caravan.
Fortunately it was still on the same piece of ground when the warden found it, a full day round trip in the car was all that was needed to recover it, we all make little mistakes, don't we?

I would like to join the Woosie Club ( if someone(s) will propose and second me), if successful in my application do I get a badge or tag or tattoo to wear as a reminder?

Cheers from John (I think it's John - well it used to be last I remember).

 

[Mel]

Imho you are more than qualified to become a Woosie.

I will propose you!

Now you need a seconder

Mel

 

[Gabsgrandad]

I'll second you. PS - are we to see our first "Woosie" Tatoo.? -- A Woosietat !

 

[Anseo]

Thank you Mel and Gabsgrandad, what happens next then?

Do I need to go through some rights of passage routine or an initiation ceremony?, if either involve pain, blood, the freezing cold, dehydration, hardship, starvation or pestilence etc, then OK, a true Woosie should be able to take anything thrown at them (I've had lots of practice - the wife throws lots of things at me).

P.S. Remember to never mention the supermarket car park thingy to my wife, she's kinda still coming to terms with it and even a strong man can only take so much (she's a terrorist on steroids when she gets started).

Thanks all, it will be an honour if you will have me.

Cheers, John

 

[WoodlandsCamper]

I think our Royal Woosieness is in Spain at the moment sunning himself, so you may need to pay for his return journey so he can personally 'knight' you. In the mean time you need to choose a name - from 2 of your CV qualities perhaps you should be Sir Forgetful (SCP)? 😛

Re Supermarket car parks (SCP) - that's how this thread started over 5 years ago. 😉 😗 🙂 😗

 

[Gafferbill]

I think our Royal Woosieness is in Spain at the moment sunning himself............

Oh no he isn't........not yet anyway 🙂

Hi Anseo.........your CV shows you are made of the sort of dedication to plonkerishness that we require in our band of Knights and Ladies.

You have been proposed and seconded so now I just have to make absolutely certain of a few things.

Can you confirm that ...

You will at all times take the up most care when spelling the forum name you have chosen for yourself.
You have your own pair of rubber gloves for the initiation ceremony.
You live in Scotland and will be happy to be known as Sir Haggis amongst us Woosies or do you prefer some other title.

 

[Anseo]

I think our Royal Woosieness is in Spain at the moment sunning himself............

Oh no he isn't........not yet anyway 🙂

Hi Anseo.........your CV shows you are made of the sort of dedication to plonkerishness that we require in our band of Knights and Ladies.

You have been proposed and seconded so now I just have to make absolutely certain of a few things.

Can you confirm that ...

You will at all times take the up most care when spelling the forum name you have chosen for yourself.
You have your own pair of rubber gloves for the initiation ceremony.
You live in Scotland and will be happy to be known as Sir Haggis amongst us Woosies or do you prefer some other title.

Respected King of the Woosies​

I beg and trust that the following will answer your questions, and is to your acceptance:​

You will at all times take the up most care when spelling the forum name you have chosen for yourself.
I curtainly will rezpeck the spellin of the name you have choosen for me and witch I gratefooly acept.

You have your own pair of rubber gloves for the initiation ceremony.
Indeed I have, latex free - and non allergy inducing to myself or others (wherever or whatever I may be commanded to touch, feel, probe or fondle).

You live in Scotland and will be happy to be known as Sir Haggis amongst us Woosies or do you prefer some other title.
The title of Sir Haggis (and the chosen Woosie colour) is the most generous and appreciated and humbling accolade I could ever have hoped to receive in this great and memorable year of Two Thousand and Seventeen - 2017, I accept the name of Sir Haggis.

Forever in gratitude,and hopeful to be Sir Haggis.

Your Woosienesses humble Servant.

I'm going to buy a lottery ticket tomorrow, Yippie-i-o ki yay, I'm singing in the rain, (thinks to self "can my year get any better than this - whoopee")

 

[Martin24]

Welcome and congratulations Sir Haggis.

You'll note I'm not in the pink, that's because I can't do it! They've all explained it many times but I'm just a woosie through and through

 

[Gagakev]

Welcome and congratulations Sir Haggis.

You'll note I'm not in the pink, that's because I can't do it! They've all explained it many times but I'm just a woosie through and through

Psst Sir Outnumbered, Sir Haggis hasn't been accepted just yet, The King will chastise you and throw you in the stocks, be very careful :evil:

Ps, To change colours is simple on the top line of the Boardcode box, top line you will see some squares which look like a chess board, highlight the name you want to highligh in colour, click on the "chess board and pick the pinky one which we all use is the 3rd column along and on the bottom line click on that colour and hey ho it;s done,
GO ON BE A DEVIL, redeem yourself to the King before he stocks you :evil: :evil:

 

[Gagakev]

I do hope Sir Haggis is accepted

Yum Yum

 

[Martin24]

Kev, I'm confused bewildered and my Sir outnumbered is still grey.

I have the solution though, going back to bed

 

[Gabsgrandad]

Get the 'kids' to sort it for you!

 

[WoodlandsCamper]

Kev, I'm confused bewildered and my Sir outnumbered is still grey.

If you mean the text in the footer I had to do mine in Word then copy and paste it across to the Profile page. The colour palette doesn't appear on the Profile Edit page like it does on the normal Message page. 🙁 :evil:

 

[Martin24]

WC, tried it many times but it just won't work. Maybe an apple thing. 🙁

 

[Martin24]

Get the 'kids' to sort it for you!

What and have to put their phones down for 5 mins. :dry:

 

[WoodlandsCamper]

Kev, I'm confused bewildered and my Sir outnumbered is still grey.

If you mean the text in the footer I had to do mine in Word then copy and paste it across to the Profile page. The colour palette doesn't appear on the Profile Edit page like it does on the normal Message page. 🙁 :evil:

Alternatively start a dummy message, making use of the colour palette, then copy that, cancel the dummy message and paste into profile. If you can't see the colour palette when replying to messages then your system is cr*p. :lol:

 

[Parksy]

Kev, I'm confused bewildered and my Sir outnumbered is still grey.

I have the solution though, going back to bed

I'll try to help Sir Outnumbered WC (4:1)

• Copy the text in brackets on the right and paste / save it on notepad [color=#ff0088
• Save the colour code on Notepad. Add a closing bracket (can't do it on here because it won't show up)
• Insert your username after the colour code brackets and add [/color] immediately after
• Copy the text with the brackets
• Open your profile by clicking your forum username from your avatar
• Click the Edit box (top right)
• Insert your text complete with brackets via paste into your signature box and click Save
• Click Save again before you close your profile and you should be sorted 🙂

 

[Gafferbill]

The title of Sir Haggis (and the chosen Woosie colour) is the most generous and appreciated and humbling accolade I could ever have hoped to receive in this great and memorable year of Two Thousand and Seventeen - 2017, I accept the name of Sir Haggis.

Forever in gratitude,and hopeful to be Sir Haggis.

..........that is the sort of grovelling that befits a Woosie.

All that remains now is for you to don said rubber gloves and grasp your caravan's toilet cassette in both hands and repeat the following out loud..........

Why am I holding this.....I must be a right Woosie 🤔 🤔

Once you have done this you can hence forth be known as Sir Haggis and will be welcomed by any of our Knights or Ladies wherever we may meet up.

Welcome Sir Haggis.

 

[Dustydog]

Congratulations Sir Haggis.
There are a few Scottish forumites. Maybe a gathering of the Woosie Clans at Strathclyde Country Park or Melrose could be in the offing.

 

[Anseo]

The title of Sir Haggis (and the chosen Woosie colour) is the most generous and appreciated and humbling accolade I could ever have hoped to receive in this great and memorable year of Two Thousand and Seventeen - 2017, I accept the name of Sir Haggis.

Forever in gratitude,and hopeful to be Sir Haggis.

..........that is the sort of grovelling that befits a Woosie.

All that remains now is for you to don said rubber gloves and grasp your caravan's toilet cassette in both hands and repeat the following out loud..........

Why am I holding this.....I must be a right Woosie 🤔 🤔

Once you have done this you can hence forth be known as Sir Haggis and will be welcomed by any of our Knights or Ladies wherever we may meet up.

Welcome Sir Haggis.

Thank you Kingy (and Dustydog for the congrats).

Tomorrow I will grab the cassette in both hands and utter the incantation as demanded by Kingy and tradition.

Further, in supine position (with the cassette held above me) I will lick the inlet and outlet connections clean, this in respect and deference to all Woosies.

I salivate at the thought 🤢

I will get back to you following the ceremony (with likely septic throat symptoms), and confirm King Woosie's command has been carried out and the needful deed done.

Until then, your humble commoner, Anseo.

 

[Anseo]

Congratulations Sir Haggis.
There are a few Scottish forumites. Maybe a gathering of the Woosie Clans at Strathclyde Country Park or Melrose could be in the offing.

Thank you, Sir Dustydog (BAR) TS .Woosie Round Table.

There are few Haggi around Strathclyde Country Park, only scoundrels that have been excommunicated from the Haggi Clans.

There are no Haggi in Melrose, even the most degenerate Haggis could not survive so close to the 'BORDER'.
No offence, but a fact nonetheless 😛 .

Any meet up of Woosie Knights and Ladies would by necessity have to take place in the West of Scotland and above the latitude relative to Central Glasgow ( give or take a hundred miles or so).

Would be great if a meet up could happen one day in Haggi territory.

Regards, Anseo.

 

[WoodlandsCamper]

Can the haggi eat all the midges BEFORE we get there? :lol: