Hmmmmmm

[GillandMike]

Had a quick chat with a neighbour who was telling me that her son and his family had inherited a caravan off his in laws. He has always hated caravans and was quite bothered by inheriting the van, but duly took his family off for a holiday. Now he and his wife have found they really enjoyed their break as, and I quote, They could let the boys go off on their bikes to play with the other children at nine o clock and not see them again until meal times. Hence the hmmmmmmm.

Gill

 

[mcghee]

9 at night?

Sounds great.

 

[gypsy]

Mmmmmmmm, I agree, I hope not another accident waiting to happen or even worse,when will some parents learn to keep an eye on their children.!!!!!!!!!!!! when the horse has bolted, too late.

Shiba.

 

[nick_374224697]

I'm not sure what you're getting at Gill???

 

[parker1158]

So I'm not the only one then nick.

 

[GillandMike]

What am I getting at?? The parents were more than happy that their children were out of sight and mind for as long as possible so that they could have time to themselves. Thats fine, but how do you know exactly where the children are, what they were doing and were thay causing any problems. I'm all in favour of children having a great time when they are on holiday, as mine did when they are younger, but I'm bothered by the 'good they are out of the way and not bothering us' attitude. Caravan sites are not always as safe as we like to think and there have recently been tragic accidents. The whole point of a family holiday is to spend time with the family, well that what we did when our two came with us.

 

[rayc]

Is it more dangerous now than when I was young,( I mean 5-10), in the 1950's? Are there more accidents or is it that in the modern world we do not expect accidents to happen. I used to play out of the sight of my parents every day and in the case of school holidays all day. My sister had an accident at 11 or so when she slipped on land above Bristol suspension bridge and I broke a collar bone falling of the slide at nursery. As far as I remember my parents accepted it as part of growing up. You cannot wrap kids in cotton wool, they must be given a chance to assess risks by experience.

As parents we all have to make a judgement of what we allow our children to do and part of that is knowing when to release the apron strings bit by bit.

 

[parker1158]

Oh I see now-guilty till proven innocent.

 

[BrianStAlbans]

Hmmmmmm , another loaded all children are bad post.

Just what the forum needed.

 

[Barking]

I suppose it depends on what you want to read into it!

Personally to me this looks more like a 'Some parents are not good' than an 'all children are bad' thread.

And I would have to aggree!

 

[Moderator2_5083849]

hmmmm indeed.

Before the topic is pounced upon and looks like a battle zone, please lets keep it peaceful.

 

[George2]

Gill worte

'The parents were more than happy that their children were out of sight and mind for as long as possible so that they could have time to themselves.'

How do you know that that is the reason they were happy, maybe, like me, they were happy that their children had some freedom, some space to play, not stuck in the house or garden, maybe like me they live in a city on a busy street with no facilities nearby and no where to go to play, maybe they were just happy to see their children having fun.

Or maybe that's not allowed either.

'but how do you know exactly where the children are, what they were doing and were thay causing any problems'

I don't feel I need to know exactly what they are doing, but I do know they will not be causing any problems

'The whole point of a family holiday is to spend time with the family'

what 24hrs a day, that would drive my children, and me, insane.

 

[RiaandJames_374303418]

Is this not questioning of parenting rather than questioning of children?

This leads back to Lisa's post, do children who are just left to their own devices end up as out of control teenagers.

On the other hand do cosseted children who are never let out of sight run wild as soon as they escape the apron strings?

When ours were young we made sure to the best of our abilty that we always knew where they were playing and they in turn knew that somebody from family or friends would be checking that they were where they said and behaving well.

Ria

 

[Darce]

It is just a minority of parents and it is just a minority of children that cause the problem.

In July I sat in fear of my caravan when kids were playing cricket with a real cricket ball near our pitch. This despite a no ball games sign.

We have just returned from week on an Adults only site and I have to say the whole week was an absolute delight.

Users ranged from two couples in a VW camper vans down on the coast for the surfing, caravans of all shapes and sizes, and an enormous America motorhome. We all chatted and enjoyed each others company as much or as little as we wanted.

Absolute Bliss

No kids

No balls

No screaming

No angry parents to deal with.

No kids playing in the shower blocks/loos etc.

I am not anti family or anti kids - I have two myself and no doubt will have grandchildren and look forward to that.

But you won't catch us on a "family" site again.

We have seen the light

Alleluia!

 

[Diane1]

brian (st albans)

19 Sep 2007 10:46 AM Hmmmmmm , another loaded all children are bad post.

No Brian, just bad choices by the parents me thinks.

 

[Diane1]

Posted by Darce

We have just returned from week on an Adults only site and I have to say the whole week was an absolute delight.

No offence meant to anyone, but we went to an adult only site in August and it was the most boring depressing place i have ever been. We took a pledge there and then never to go to an adult only site ever again. But at then end of the day each to his own.

Never thought i would say this but i have to agree with Katherine and Brian(StAlbans). It has got to be an age thing or a child hate thing with these adult only sites.

 

[Rubix]

My first thought when I read the initial post was, this may not be any different for the parents and children from what they do at home, it just happens to be they are on holiday !

I also aggree with George's post a family holiday doesn't always have to be spent in each others pockets 24/7.

A holiday is supposed to be a "break from the norm" a "rest" or whatever you want from it. Depending upon the age of your kids also you may spend all the time with them or little if they are teenagers.

And I shall end on : We are all entitled to be different, and that includes how we bring up our kids.

 

[gypsy]

I have to agree with Darce, I go to Adult sites for the same reasons, and I don't have to sit in fear of a ball or a bike causing problems, and it is so peaceful, after all that is what we go away for rest relaxation peace and quite. Lovely.

Shiba.

 

[Darce]

Ah! - I see were I am so wrong now.

Because I have brought up two children who are now both in their twenties and prefer the company of adults to adults plus badly behaved children, I must suffer from a "child hate thing" or be of an age where I am loosing my marbles.

Laughable.

And whilst I appreciate that not all children are badly behaved - I really do think that anyone with an "adult" mentality would realise that not everyone chooses to holiday at, say, Butlins just because it caters for children. Likewise we tried an Adult only site and far from being boring, it was filled with stimulating mature conversation and a fare bit of wonderful peace and quiet.

Why do caravanners that choose Adult only sites get criticised by those with children when I could choose a hotel that caters for children or one that says it does not.

If you have children - look after them they are precious

Those of us that have done that hard job of bringing up children really do not want to see how badly others do it!

 

[George2]

Darce wrote:

'Why do caravanners that choose Adult only sites get criticised by those with children when I could choose a hotel that caters for children or one that says it does not.'

You're not being criticised for making that choice, but for telling us what hideous places sites with children are... if you're happy in your 'Adult Only' sites, that's fine, go to them and enjoy yourself, but you don't need to come here telling us how badly behaved our children are, how irresponsible we are as parents and how dangerous it is out there in the big bad world, just leave us and our sites alone and go live in your own world.

Or is it ok for you to slag off 'family friendly' sites, but not ok for us to criticise your choice?

 

[Darce]

Dianne wrote:-

"It has got to be an age thing or a child hate thing with these adult only sites."

I find this offensive as it is not only ageist but Pidgeon-holes those that prefer Adult only sites as "child haters"

As a "young" 50 year old with grown up kids - I cannot help but think those that come out all defensive on here protest a tad too much!

 

[Joyce_5063910]

I have to agree with a lot of what Darce has said about being on a site and having peace and quiet away from children although I have never been to an adult only site.

I am a Guide Leader with 38 children from 10 to 16 years and have been for 20 years and also mother to two now in their late twenties.

I was a teacher and I love children but I also like time away from them.

My own two were well behaved and I always knew when young where they were, although they were also given freedom to roam when safe.

The guides we look after at camps and trips are also well behaved but have a super and enjoyable time with us hence the reason we have so many and to an older age than most units.

I love seeing children grow and develope and learn new skills it is a wonderful experience but I also like silence and peace and just relaxing with no young people to worry about.

 

[RiaandJames_374303418]

Well put Joyce.

My two were in Venture Scouts and Guides and had a great times.

It comes back to good parenting, paying for a uniform and taking the children to the weekly meetings and making sure you know where they are and that to the best of you ability that they are in safe hands.

Ria

 

[giovanni_5060838]

A good choice of topic me thinks, i take the middle road it reminds me that for sure my children need space and freedom but at the same time i need to try to found the balance and still make sure they are safe and not being a niusanes to anyone.

Of corse its difficult but thats whats so good about topics like these, it reminds you,and thats more important than my kids are good or don't wrap them up in cotton wool, its trying to find the balance......I hope one day i do.

 

[JeremyClarksson]

I remember as a boy leaving the house at around 9 with my friends and a packed lunch and cycling appx 5 miles to a large pond where we would spend the rest of the day trying to catch fish, newts, frogs and tadpoles and not returning until teatime.

No mobiles obviously!

I see it now as really good grounding for future life and responsibility and can not see how it was a bad thing.