One liners, Humour

[Beachball]

How much does it cost Santa to park his Sleigh? "Nothing, it"s on the house

 

[Hutch]

Why doesn't Santa like coming down the Chimney,
Because he get Claus- triphobia

 

[Beachball]

The kid who started a business tying shoelaces on the playground? It was a knot -for-profit.

 

[Raywood]

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations. Tinselitous.

 

[audiorob]

Why is Santa’s garden weed free?
Because he always goes round with a hoe hoe hoe!

 

[Beachball]

A new study shows that one-third of people don"t floss.while the other two-thirds couldn"t answer with all the local anesthetic in their mouths.

 

[Beachball]

My friend"s bakery burned down last night .Now his business is toast .

 

[Beachball]

The kid who started a business tying shoelaces on the playground? It was a knot-for-profit

 

[Hutch]

Are Believers in the colour Red,
Cyan tologists.???

 

[toad a caravan]

I had a proper ding ding last night with the missus..told her what I thought of her.all the time I'd wasted I left Nothing out....just glad she didn't wake up 🙂😁

 

[Sam Vimes]

Are Believers in the colour Red,
Cyan tologists.???

Very subtle 😄 and only if they've seen the light.

 

[Beachball]

Are people born with photographic memories, or does it take time to delelop ?

 

[Jcloughie]

Are people born with photographic memories, or does it take time to delelop ?

I made the mistake of telling this to a 12 year old. Of course she knows nothing about developing photographs, so it fell flat.

John

 

[Beachball]

The cat who ate a ball of yarn ? She had mittens.

 

[Jcloughie]

Is it worth a visit?




John

 

[Challenger]

 

[Beachball]

I was addicted to the hokey pokey, but then l turned myself around.

 

[GaryB]

 

[Beachball]

If a parsley farmer gets sued, can they garnish his wages?

 

[Challenger]

Fnarrr . 😊

 

[toad a caravan]

Been fleeced I think🙂bah bah

 

[Beachball]

Maybe if we start telling people their brain is an app, they"ll want to use it.

 

[Buckman]

Maybe if we start telling people their brain is an app, they"ll want to use it.

Love it as has to one of the best I have read.

 

[Beachball]

I just got kick out of a secret cooking society. I spilled the beans.

 

[toad a caravan]

Townie to "pickyourown" farmer..What do you put on your rhubarb? Farmer "Cow dung lad". Townie...Oh.....we put custard on ours !